Our class was of two, our classroom expansive, and our lessons most enlightening.

Notable teachers included Fleep the sad-but-alive tree who taught us about sorrow, the crop semi-circles on Churchill pitch which taught us conspiracy theories about burning eels falling through holes in the ozone layer, and Spiz/Hyacinth the schizophrenic old lady/dj tree who was mostly just confusing. We also received messages from Russia via chocolate wrappers.

as it turned out, our classroom crossed boundaries between several different planetary zones. This was quite accidentally discovered, as (scandalously) it turns out there are a number of doorways to other worlds located around Churchill and the astronomy department; mostly between significant pairs of trees. In one of these other worlds people had tragically been turned into wire sculptures and magnetically aligned. We narrowly escaped this fate by guiding each other through the wires with our eyes closed. in another our brains turned to pulp and started spouting inspired but wonky poetry.

Our lessons also raised a number of unanswered questions:

-         can spiders jump? Can they fly? Do they swing like batman? How do they make webs stretch from tree to tree?

-         Why don’t beavers live in trees?

-         If you cross over accidentally into other worlds, how do you get back to the right one? And how do you know when you are there?